About Jesus     Steve Sweetman

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My Journey Through The Ecclesiastical Maze

Part 37

Three Men On A Relational Journey

 

If you’re confused about functional relationships, let me be a story-teller for one chapter. 

 

Emery had been part of a traditional church for years but of late has been discouraged and frustrated over what he calls political maneuvering and corporate style   management of church affairs.  He has a mid-management job with a mid-size corporation.  He now concludes that modern-day church life looks more like his world of business than the pattern set forth in the Bible.  He stepped down from leadership at his church a few months ago and was saddened that no one in the congregation seemed interested in knowing why he handed in his resignation.  Emery has two close Christian friends named Ralph and Jack.   Ralph has been outside of the traditional church for five years now, and enjoys his day of rest every Sunday.  Jack on the other hand is a part of a community church and is quite happy where he is, and unlike Ralph he is very busy every Sunday.

 

One Monday these three men met at a local coffee shop.  Emery told the others that the previous day was his last meeting at the church he had attended for years.  Ralph placed his coffee cup on the table while his heart sank to the floor when he heard Emery’s words.  He and Jack knew what that church once meant to Emery, but Emery was no longer happy with the business of church. 

 

Jack was the first to respond.  “So what’s next?”

 

Emery hung his head while answering, hoping no one would notice the tear that was attempting to slip from the corner of his eye. “I’m not sure Jack.  Church has always been a big part of my life, but I just seem to have a hard time with it when I read something altogether different in the Bible.”

 

It was obvious to Ralph how Emery felt.  “You feel pretty bad about this, don’t you Emery?”

 

With his eyes focused downward on his coffee cup Emery replied, “after being there for two decades, I am very relieved from the stress of it all, but still it’s breaking my heart.”  

 

“They’re going to miss you around there Emery”, Ralph said.  “You did a lot for that church.”   

 

 “I suppose,” responded Emery in a sad tone of voice.

 

Ralph’s heart was heavy.  He felt for Emery.  He had experienced all this a few years back.   As he glanced at his fidgeting fingers, he said, “Emery, two thoughts people have when someone leaves a church are, who’s going to fill his job, and we’ll miss his tithe.”

 

Emery shook his head and sighed, “maybe that’s why no one was interested in why I stepped down from leadership.  Their thoughts were consumed with my replacement and the loss of some church income.  Nevertheless,  even though I’ve left the organized church, I still want to serve Jesus.” 

 

Ralph was glad to hear that. “Many people simply fade into obscurity at this point Emery, and you never see them again, but that’s the worst thing they can do.” 

 

Jack wondered what Emery might now do.  “So if you still want to serve Jesus, how will you do that since you’ve left your church?”

 

Even though Jack’s question was directed towards Emery, Ralph jumped in with the answer.  “You can still serve Jesus outside of traditionalism.  There’s absolutely no doubt about that.”

 

Jack turned from looking at Emery to catch Ralph’s eyes and asked, “how’s that Ralph?”

 

“It’s all about functional relationships,” answered Ralph.

 

Both Emery and Jack were curious.  Jack asked, “what’s  that?  Is it the latest Christian fad, or is it new age stuff?”

 

Ralph got a laugh over that one.  “No, it’s not new age, and it’s not the latest fad, although I do recognize that many churches like chasing the latest Christian fad.  It’s actually a pretty old way of thinking.  It’s New Testament thinking, something many churches have neglected and that’s why many Christians have never heard of it.  The three of us have been friends for years.  We’ve done lots of things together.  We’ve gone on countless fishing trips.  We’ve golfed together.  We’ve done  a bunch of stuff together.  We’ve been a great support for each other, as is the case right now.  But there’s one thing we’ve done little of together.  We’ve left that to the organized church.”

 

Emery wasn’t catching where Ralph was heading so he asked, “so what haven’t we done?” 

 

Ralph didn’t leave his two friends guessing.  “We haven’t done much in the way of serving Jesus as three friends.  Like most people, we’ve served in our local church groups in jobs they have created for us.  So this is my suggestion.  Let’s get together next Saturday and ask Jesus if there’s anything the three of us can do for Him together.  It doesn’t have to be a big deal, although if Jesus asks us to do something, I’d consider that a big deal.”

 

The three met together the next week.  They weren’t sure if they heard anything from Jesus so they got together two more times.  After the third session of prayer they felt Jesus had something for them to do as friends.                    

                         

Now six months later the three men were out for coffee again talking about the journey they had been on together over the last few months.  All three men felt Jesus asked them to reach out to a poor family in town as well as providing a weekly Bible study for a few people who wanted to understand God’s Word. 

 

Unlike their coffee time before their three sessions of prayer, Emery was now smiling.  “I can’t believe how well I feel now. Six months ago I felt so down and out, and now I actually feel like I’m doing something meaningful for Jesus.  I’m glad you came up with this idea Ralph.” 

 

Ralph couldn’t let that comment pass.  “Emery, Emery, you know that wasn’t my idea.  It’s New Testament thinking.  We’re all individual parts of the Body of Christ.  We all have our own specific job to do as well as working  with a couple other body parts to whom we are joined.  The traditional church hasn’t joined us to each other.  Jesus has.  It’s the Holy Spirit that unites us in both friendship and function no matter what organization we are a part of.”

 

“Oh yes, Ralph.  You’re right as usual,” replied Emery.

 

“Ralph is always right, Emery”, added Jack.

 

“I sincerely doubt that”, responded Ralph as he laughed off the compliment. 

 

Emery looked over at Jack. “So what about you Jack? You’re still a part of the traditional church.  How do you feel about what we’ve been doing?”

 

Jack responded by saying, “I think it’s great.  I’m still involved in the organized church, but it’s clear that I have this special bond with you two guys and what we’ve been doing is very rewarding for me, although there are some at the church who wonder why I need to be involved outside of our church.” 

 

“That’s typical,” chuckled Ralph under his breath

 

Emery spoke up by saying,  “I feel so much closer to both of you and at the same time I feel our friendship is functioning in the Body of Christ.” 

 

A huge grin flashed across Ralph’s face.  “You’re so right Emery.  That’s what the Body of Christ is all about.” 

 

“Preach it brother”, responded Emery as he pounded his fist on the table as if the table was a pulpit and he was a preacher.  “Jesus has joined us together, not just to go on our fishing trips, but to do something for Him. We have been joined together in functional relationships.”

 

“By the way”, interrupted Jack, “when are we going on our next fishing trip, or will Jesus still let us do that?”

 

“Sure He will,” answered Ralph.  “Jesus went on a few fishing trips Himself. We are joined to one another in friendship just as much as we’re joined in service to Jesus.”  At this point Ralph picks up the bill and goes to pay the cashier. 

 

As the three men leave to join their wives who were shopping next door, Emery says, “hopefully I have some money left after my wife is finished shopping.”

 

“Well at least you don’t have to give money to the church anymore,” laughed Jack as he patted Emery on the shoulder.

 

“Not so”, answered Emery.  “I still plan on putting aside the same amount of money each week.  I’m just giving elsewhere, to individuals and groups who need it most.  And I really don’t care about the tax receipt anymore.”   

 

This story explains the meaning of functional relationships.  Each one of these men had a friend that the other two men didn’t have in common.  Ralph had a friend named Brian.  Emery and Jack really didn’t have a close friendship with Brian although they knew him.  Ralph and Brian visit an elderly man in a nursing home.  Emery has a friend named Peter. They sing Christian tunes along with a few secular songs together in a local pub.  Jack and his friend Paul joined a small art gallery with the hopes of inspiring budding artists, and sharing Jesus along the way. Thus the chain of functional relationships extends outward throughout the Body of Christ as it was meant to be.     

                

For those who are happy in the traditional church and see no need to change anything, that’s fine, but I’d suggest this.  The time might soon come that outside pressures will close many traditional church doors.  If this happens, the story of this chapter will become very meaningful.  Jesus functioned relationally with the Twelve and with others.  So did Paul, Peter, and the rest of the early church.  You might be forced to live this way at some point as well, and if you are forced to live this way, consider yourself fortunate and blessed to be a functioning member with your friends in the Body of Christ.     

 

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